


The First Timeline

by Suichi_Nigra



Series: Cycle of Rebirth [2]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Bonding, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Casual Sex, Cause Ashley, Characters OOC due to AU, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends to Lovers, Garrus AU, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Minor Character Death, Not Canon Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Racism, Slow Burn, Smut, Wrex being a overprotective wannabe Dad, mentionings of past relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:49:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27770056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Suichi_Nigra/pseuds/Suichi_Nigra
Summary: Garrus Vakarian had been a happy Turian after Bonding with Nihlus Kryik, but that Happiness ended when Sparatus told him of his Bondmates Death.Devastated he swore to find out why Saren betrayed the both of them and decided to join Commander Shepards Crew, who just wanted to help him with his Grief.Tie in Fanfiction to my other Work: Rebirth of the Archangel.Here Garrus lives his first Life and fights together with Shepard in the Reaper War.Mass Effects Trilogy Story, mostly Canon Compliant with a few deviations here and there considering Garrus' Life.Kind of Garrus POV but not really detailed on most of the Missions more in the inbetween Missions.Can be read as a standalone Work.
Relationships: Male Shepard/Garrus Vakarian
Series: Cycle of Rebirth [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2031526
Comments: 7
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the First Life of my Garrus from Rebirth of the Archangel and how things happened there during the storyline of the ME trilogy.  
> It can be fully read as a standalone, you will miss nothing for this Fanfiction if you only read this.  
> I use some Turian headcanon words in this Story
> 
> I do not own Mass Effect and any of their Characters.

„Vakarian.“, Executor Pallin stood in front of his Desk as he spoke, looking down to him, his Face solemn.  
„Sparatus asked for you to go to his Office immediatly, he has something important to tell you.“  
Garrus Vakarian had been working on a Case about a Spectre that might have gone Rogue but he did not know yet which Spectre.  
The Council had tasked C-Sec with that Case because they themselves were not sure who it was or even if it was true and asking one of their Agents just wasn't a Possibility.  
So the Case fell into his Hands and he had found a few things that proved one had gone rogue and he had also ruled out three Spectres already.  
Avitus Rix, Nihlus Kryik and Teifun Nola were cleared as far as he was concerned.  
Jondam Bau was not behaving suspicously really but that did not mean anything.  
Saren Arterius on the other Hand was hidden deep in some kind of undercover Mission so he was neither cleared nor really suspicious right now.  
Tela Vasir though showed quiet a lot of strange Behaviour and a lot of traffic with the Shadow Broker.  
Sadly there was not much he could find anymore about them and also nothing about the other 7 Spectres that existed.  
Everything was classified, but maybe Sparatus would give him some more Clearance if he brought him his Findings now?  
With that in mind, he moved his Officechair away from his Desk and stood, easily towering over his Superior.  
„Right away, Sir? I just found a Lead that could get me somewhere.“  
He still was slightly unwilling to stop his Investigation right now and his Mood had gotten worse and worse ever since the ride Side of his Neck had started to hurt and getting worse a few Hours ago.  
„Yes, the Councilor made it abundantly clear that you get there immediatly.“, the Executor answered sounding slightly disaproving.  
„Very well.“, Garrus said and walked out of his Office.  
He didn't even think about the fact that Pallin usually never came to him personally just to send him somewhere else.  
It took him only a few Minutes to walk from the Academy to the Citadel Tower and taking the Elevator up to Sparatus' Floor.  
Like always the Elevator took Hours to travel upwards and it was made worse by Garrus' restlessness.  
Finally the Elevator let him leave at the right Floor and he aproached the Desk of the Councilors Secretary.  
„Detective Vakarian, Sir, the Councilor is already waiting for you.“, the Tarin said, then paged the Councilor to tell him he was here.  
The Door to the Office opened, so the palegrey Torin entered.  
He stood in front of the Councilors Desk, back straight and waiting for the other Male to speak.  
Laiel Sparatus was not a Torin he was going to show a single bit of disrespect towards, even though he was getting a very bad Feeling in his Guts.  
Suddenly he wished he was wearing his Uniform instead of his C-Sec Armor, he would feel less constricted that way.  
„Sit Vakarian.“, Sparatus ordered with a frown on his Face gesturing to the little seating Area in the Edge of the Room, standing up himself and walking towards it and sitting down in one of the comfy looking Armchairs.  
Raising a Browridge the Officer did the same, waiting still for Sparatus to tell him why he called him here.  
The older Torin watched him attentively, not saying anything but looking like he was searching for Words.  
„As stated in his Documents, you are Nihlus Kryiks Bondmate, is this true?“, he finally settled on.  
„Yes... Sir.“, he confirmed, the bad Feeling in his Guts getting worse, but not asking further.  
„Nihlus Kryik was killed in Action. He died on a Human Colony called Eden Prime.“, Sparatus said without mincing his Words one bit.  
It was like a Knife had struck his Soul at those Words, cutting deep with a jagged Edge.  
He was speechless, looking at the Councilor who had finally dropped the professional Mask and seemed sympathetic.  
„The SSV Normandy SR-1 is bringing his Body back to the Citadel as we speak. They will arrive within the Hour.“  
He did not say the Rest, it was not necessary, Garrus knew what would happen to Nihlus' Body.  
„H-ho-ow....“, his Voice wasn't working at all but Sparatus understood him anyway.  
„I do not know yet, Vakarian. We are still waiting for more Information, but the Humans only want to give those to the Council directly. They did inform us though that another Spectre was spotted on Eden Prime, though did not tell us who exactly.  
Commander Shepard was Planetside when it happened, so I assume he will be reporting back to us.“  
The palegrey Torin sank back into the Armchair as much as it let him looking up at the Ceiling without saying anything more.  
He could not believe it. Nihlus dead, his Bondmate, just like that, gone.  
They hadn't even seen each other in half a Year, but had promised to go on a proper Date the next Time the Spectre was on the Station after this appointment.  
He would have been back after Eden Prime, he had promised.  
He had promised...  
Garrus released a shuddering Breath, his left Hand on the right Side of his Neck on the Bondmark Nihlus had left there a few Years ago.  
No wonder it had been hurting there.  
His Bond, the Connection they had shared... was severed with his Death.  
„Does Sa-“, he started, but coughed, his Throat gone completly dry.  
„Does Saren know...?“, he asked, his Voice barely more than a Whisper.  
Sparatus shook his Head.  
„He has denied our calls, so I'm not sure, but it could be because he is already mourning.“  
The dark grey Torin stood up and walked past the younger one, gripping his left Shoulder as he walked away towards his Desk.  
It was neither Pity nor a Dismissal, he was free to stay a while to let the Information sink in.  
Sparatus knew what it meaned to lose a Bondmate, though he could not imagine how such a young Turian as Vakarian would be able to cope with that.  
Right as he sat back down at his Desk, he heard the telltale Keen of a devastated Turian.  
He paged his Secretary.  
„Mara, tell Executor Pallin to get Officer Vakarian as soon as he's ready to head back and take him off his Case, I grant him a leave of Absence corresponding to the loss of his Bondmate.“, he said as silently as he could so the other Torin did not hear him.  
//Yes Councilor.//, she answered him.  
It took the younger Torin around 20 Minutes to calm down enough to stop his Keening, though he was still taking one shuddering Breath after another, his Shoulders trembling visibly.  
„I-I should leave. I took enough off of your Time, Councilor.“, he finally said, though he did not stand up, still not finding enough Strength in his Legs to do so.  
„Take your Time Vakarian, I know how it feels to lose a Bondmate.“, Sparatus answered, but Vakarian shook his Head and stood up, looking a bit faint as he turned to him, though he was looking at the Floor rather than him.  
„Thank you Councilor, but I will take my leave now if I may.“  
The Councilor sighed, then nodded.  
„Very well Vakarian. I called someone to pick you up earlier, they should be already waiting for you.“  
He pressed a Button on his Desk and the Door opened.  
With a Nod, the Officer left.

Down in front of the Council Chambers Executor Pallin himself was waiting for Garrus.  
„Vakarian.“, he greeted, this Time carrying Sympathie in his Voice, he knew what had happened.  
„Executor...“, Garrus greeted back nearly whispering.  
„The Councilor granted you a Leave of Absence for the Loss of your Bondmate.  
For now your Case will be given to someone Else.“, Pallin said.  
„Leave of Absence? I- No, I don't want that... I-I need to find out who killed my Mate! I know it was a Spectre! Just let me keep working on it a little While longer!“, he argued, finding more and more of his Voice back with every Word he spoke.  
„You just lost your Mate Garrus, letting you keep this Case is ridiculous. Your Investigation is over Garrus, go home.“, the Executor said, leaving no Room for Arguments then left him standing there.  
They had not noticed a Group of Humans walking up to them as they had argued.  
The Officer sighed dispirited then turned to leave, but not to go home as the Executor told him to do, but stopped in his Tracks as he saw 3 Humans in front of him.  
He recognized the Male standing in the middle.  
„Commander Shepard? Garrus Vakarian, I was investigating the Case over a Spectre gone rogue.“, he greeted, not sounding at all like he had just lost a part of himself.  
„Oh? Anything intresting I should know about? Saren Arterius was on Eden Prime and I know he had killed Nihlus.“, the Commander was not impressed.  
That was News to Garrus and it stumped him. Saren was the Spectre on Eden Prime?  
„...Saren Arterius was supposedly on a deep cover up Mission and no one was capable of pinpointing his Location.  
He is a Spectre and thus all his Files are classified, he could have easily used this to cover his Tracks.  
I might have a Lead though.“, he still spoke normally.  
One of the 2 other Humans, the other Male, then interjected before Shepard could say anything more.  
„The Council is probably ready for us by now Commander.“  
The Officer wished them luck and left the Tower.

If the Commander was back on the Station, that meaned Nihlus Body was too, but instead of going to see him, he wanted to find out if it really had been Saren who had done it.  
He could not believe it.  
Saren and Nihlus were bonded just like he himself was with the red Torin.  
It would mean that the silver Spectre would have killed his own Bondmate.  
Nothing a normal Turian would be capable of under normal Circumstances.  
Garrus resisted the Urge to see his Mate right away.  
He needed to go to see if Dr. Michelle was willing to speak with him about a Quarian who might have the Information he needed.  
The Officer walked back towards C-Sec Academy and through it into the lower Wards where he would find Dr. Michelles Clinic.  
He was stopped for a few Minutes by one of his Co-Workers, who asked for his help with a Krogan, before he could get down into the lower Ward to the Clinic.  
Right as he was about to walk through the Door, he heard Voices insight that spoke loudly and seemed angry.  
He silently walked through the Door then and immediatly hid behind a halfway out of Sight.  
„I swear! I haven't said anything!“, Dr. Michelle said, fear evident in her Voice.  
At this Moment, he saw Shepard walk through the Door and staying in plain Sight and distracting the 4 Human Men who were threatening the Doctor and taking her Hostage.  
He used that Moment to get into a better Position while the Commander kept their Attention on himself.  
The Man had of course seen him, but acted like he was not there.  
The Turian took aim carefully, then shot the Man who held the Doctor Hostage right in his Ear, killing him instantly.  
All Hell broke loose and more Shots rang immediatly.  
Thankfully Michelle had thrown herself to the Ground the Second she was free and thus wasn't hurt.  
They got rid of the other 3 Men in mere Moments and he helped the Doctor stand back up.  
„You alright Doctor? Are you hurt?“, he asked her.  
„No, no. I'm fine thanks to you.“, she said still shaking from all of it.  
Garrus nodded then looked over to the Commander who was grinning at him.  
„Perfect Timing Shepard, gave me a clear Shot at that Bastard.“, he said.  
„You took him down clean!“  
„Sometimes you get lucky. Now Dr. Michelle why were they threatening you?“  
The Commander nodded, he also wanted to know.

Dr. Michelle pointed them to Fist, an Agent of the Shadow Broker who seemed to work for his own Agenda or someone who was not the Shadow Broker.  
Shepard said it was Saren, though the palegrey Turian still did not truly believe that but showed no Signs of it.  
The Quarian he was looking for aparently held information about the Geth but that was all Dr. Michelle knew.  
„Time we paid Fist a visit then.“, the Commander grumbled towards his Followers.  
„This is your Show Shepard, but I need to find that Evidence as much as you do. I am coming with you!“, Garrus threw in just as the Humans turned around to leave.  
The Commander turned back around and looked at him, raising a Brow then asked: „You are a Turian, why do you want to bring Saren down?“  
„It's not about me being a Turian, Shepard. I need to know who killed Nihlus and bring them to Justice no matter who it is and what it will cost me!“, he growled loudly with Conviction in his Voice, spreading his Mandibles and showing his Teeth menacingly.  
„Well then welcome aboard Garrus.“  
„Shepard... We can't just-“, the female Human tried to cut in but Shepard interrupted her.  
„We need all the help that we can get and whatever Reason Garrus has, you have seen his Skills, do you suggest you would have made that Shot as clean as he did without hurting the Hostage?“  
The Female deflated a bit but still argued. „Of course I would have.“  
She sounded rather weak now, making the Commander huff at her but not saying anything further.  
„We are not the only ones after Fist Shepard. There's a Krogan that was hired by the Shadow Broker to get rid of him.“

It took a lot of running around until they finally found the Quarian and saved her.  
She showed them her Evidence and yes, it was Saren who was speaking in the Recording.  
He still could not fully believe it.  
They showed the Council their Findings, Garrus earned himself a weird Look by the Turian Councilor and Shepard was instated as a Spectre.  
It was now Time to finally go see Nihlus and say his Goodbye to him.  
His Body was already brought over to a Deadhouse to clean him and dress him up, so he was ready to be cremated.  
The palegrey Torin entered the Halls of the Deadhouse.  
There was no need to ask for Directions, he had been here often enough because of his Job.  
Seen many People mourn their Beloved here and now he would walk the same Path as all those People did with the same Mindset they had.  
Nihlus had been the Light of his Life.  
He brought him Laughter when he had needed it the most. Showed him Tenderness when his Patrem shot down his Dreams to become a Spectre himself ruthlessly.  
He had been his guiding Star, a part of his Soul, his very Core, his Reason to live.  
The Love of his Life.  
Garrus walked up through the Halls, knowing exactly where he needed to go.  
His Mate was lying on top of one of the Dissectiontables, the Asari that was working on him currently cleaning his Hands and pulling down his Sleeves properly.  
Then she laid his Hands on his Stomache, the right one on top of the left.  
„Nihlus...“, he whispered as he finally stood next to him, his Voice cracking.  
Why had Saren done this?  
There just was no Reason.  
Nihlus was both their Mate. The only one the silver Spectre ever trusted enough to bond with.  
Garrus had always wanted to bond with him too, but the older Torin always denied him.  
Always told him he would not any more Distractions cloud over his Mind and he had understood that, had not liked it but had learned to accept it.  
And now? Now he was left with nothing.  
His Mate dead, his Lover a Traitor, he was stuck on this Station playing by the Rules of C-Secs Redtape and actually being send into a Leave of Absence for the loss of a Bondmate.  
They would not allow him to do any Work at all for a full Year.  
He would be sitting in his Apartment, brooding over it all, blaming himself, regreting not being able to avenge the red Torin.  
And here he was lying, looking like he was sleeping if it weren't for the Hole over his right Eye.  
By now he knew how his Mate had died.  
„Had he not tought you to never turn your back to anyone...?“, he whispered.  
„He was right, you can never trust anybody... not even your own... your own Bondmate...“  
Bitterness filled his Voice as he spoke near silently.  
Garrus took off his right Glove, trembling as he did not dare to touch his Mate, he did not want to feel how cold he was.  
His Hand hovered right above his left Mandible, barely touching it.  
A Keen escaped his Throat as he felt the Cold kreep from Nihlus' Mandible into his Palm.  
But now as he felt it, he felt the urge to hug him.  
It was strong, undeniably so, so he did.  
Pulling the dead Body of his Mate into his Arms, not caring that he rumpled the Clothes and his Hands falling to his Sides.  
He needed to be close. At least one last Time.  
He would never hear his Voice again or his Laugh.  
Never see his beautiful emerald green Eyes again. Closed forever.  
Never feel his Touch on his Hide and Plates again.  
Garrus keened loudly, not caring for anyone to hear him, or see him.  
He nuzzled his Crest with his own, not caring for the Bullethole there, spreading his Scent over his Mate one last Time.  
It took him a lot of Willpower to separate himself from Nihlus, carefully laying him back down again.  
The Asari who had left him alone to Mourn came back now, but she kept her Distance.  
She watched and waited for him to give her the Sign that it was Time.  
It took him another While, staring down at him, then closing his Eyes and exhaling loudly.  
He looked at the Asari, she looked back at him.  
There was no Pity in her Eyes, only Sympathie, Encouragement.  
He needed to do the next Step. It was necessary.  
So he closed his Eyes again and nodded, reluctantly giving his 'Okay' to proceed.  
The Woman came closer, putting Nihlus' Hands back where they had been before, then used her Biotics to lift him into a Cremationcasket.  
They had chosen a beautiful white one, probably one reserved for Spectres.  
Not that it would do him any good anymore now.  
She closed the casket, then lifted it again with her Biotics and manouvered it into the Furnace.  
Before she could close it though, he laid his bare Hand on the Casket and spoke a small Prayer.  
„May the Spirits guid you Home Nihlus.“  
He took his Hand away and stepped back, watched as the Asari closed the Furnace and watched the Flames consume the Wood through the small Window.

It did not take long until only ashes were left of his Mate.  
He was allowed to take some of it to spread it in Palavens Nightwind, as was traditional.  
Though he did not intend to do that anytime soon, he still took enough to fill a full Pouch with it.  
Garrus was about to leave the Deadhouse, when he saw a familiar Face.  
„Shepard.“, he greeted, Voice still raw from his Keening.  
„I didn't know he had a Mate. He was a good Man, didn't deserve to die like this.“, the Human told him, looking concerned for his wellbeing.  
„I had wanted to ask you if you would like to join my Squad to hunt Saren, but... I guess...“  
„I would love to Shepard. Anything to get away from this Station. I would do anything to find out why Saren would kill his own Mate...“, he interrupted, baffling the Commander.  
He saw there was a Question in the Humans Eyes, but he did not ask it and Garrus did not bother with it further.  
„Alright, then welcome aboard. We will depart tomorrow morning at 0800 so be ready by then.“, he told him instead clapping him on the Shoulder twice before he left again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should mention that Garrus in this Story is a thicccc Boy and not thicccc as in fat but as in Tall.  
> Turians in this Fic have an average height of 6,5 Feet to 6,8 while Garrus is 7,6 Feet (232 cm).  
> Humans are all over the Place between 5,5 to 6,0 as the average.  
> I leave Shepard undescribed so you can put your own in there except for his Height which is 6,3 Feet. (194 cm)
> 
> Some Facts for this Fic that might not be Canon:  
> I use Citadel Standart Time. So in Human hours a Day is nearly 28 hours long and the year like in my Main Fic has 15 Months.  
> Garrusc was born in 2139 and is 18 Years older than Shepard.  
> Turians have an average Life expectancy of 180 - 200 Years. Humans around 100 - 130 Years. (I figured why not, they found out how to make MediGel so why not how to expand their Life expectancy)  
> I use Citadel standart Years.  
> I kind of found out around when the Asari found the Citadel and put that into a year number which would make more sense to be used in the Galaxy than human years. It is NOT accurate though. But as I had already used that in my other Fic I just stick with it. (I noticed the inaccuracy too late.)  
> It is currently the Year 4621 (Canon is 2183).

Chapter 2

Garrus was standing in front of the Normandy at 0600, 2 Hours before the Ship would depart, a duffel bag slung over his Shoulder, just big enough to hold a few spare Clothes, Undersuits, some Toiletries and his Weapons.  
Pallin had Datapad with his Resignation waiting for him on his Desk.  
Red Tape had stopped him long enough, but no longer.  
He exhaled heavily as he watched the Ship.  
It was a real Beauty he had to give them that and if everything would go well, it would also be his Home until he'd found Saren and found out his Reason to kill their Mate.  
The Officer hadn't slept a Second last Night, his Neck constantly hurting and itching and too many Thoughts and too much Grief on his Mind to rest.  
He doubted he would be able to find any Rest anytime soon.  
Hopefully there would be something to occupy his Mind with on board the Normandy.  
After he went through Decon and walked into the CIC of the Ship, he was greeted by stares and whispers that thought he could not hear them.  
Humans always forgot that Turians had much better Hearing than them, so they could have also screamed the Racism in his Ears and it would have been the same Outcome.  
He didn't care though.  
Let the Humans think whatever they wanted, Shepard asked him to join, he did and nothing else mattered.  
„Commander.“, he heard a Human Male speak somewhere behind him, so he turned to look, after all he needed to know where Shepard was so he could get a Post on this Ship.  
„The Turian you mentioned yesterday just came through the Airlock.“, the Man spoke into the Intercom.  
Garrus walked towards him and into the Cockpit to wait there.  
At least this Guy hadn't started on the Gossip like his Colleagues had when he entered the Ship.  
He turned around to look up at him and made a weird whistling Sound that really hurt his Ears, so he winced.  
„Ah sorry 'bout that. I'm Joker. You're huge Man. Are all you Guys this huge or is it just you? Do you even fit through the Doors without hitting your Head?“, the Man, Joker, spoke.  
„The name's Garrus. No it's just me, I got used to lean forward when walking through Doors, so no hitting my Head.“, he answered. His Voice was low as he talked, devoid of Emotion and his Subvocals barely there.  
„Damn... that Stick is stuck deep isn't it?“, the Human said with a shake of his Head.  
The Turian raised a Browridge at that and opened his Mouth to answer.  
Before he could answer him though they were interrupted by the Commander.  
„You're early Vakarian.“, he greeted the Officer as he walked up next to him offering his Arm in a Turian Greeting. He took it, somehow not suprised that the Human would show Respect to his Culture.  
„Yeah didn't want to be late to the Party, Commander. Wouldn't want you to miss out on my superior sniping Skills.“  
„You bet I don't. I had no Time yet to read through your Dossier, but I'll do that while Chakwas gets you through the Physical Examination.“  
Shepard motioned him to follow as he walked back through the CIC.  
They walked through a Door on the right and down some Stairs and entered the Mess.  
The Commander explained a few things to him as they went, when Food was served, where the Crews Quarters were and where he could store his Stuff. then came to a Stop in front of a Door and looked up at him.  
The Door opened I front of them and he walked inside, a Woman reading through a Datapad at her Desk, looked up at them, her Eyes immediatly staring right at the Turian, though he saw warmth in her Gaze unlike of how the rest of the Crew had greeted him.  
Not all Humans disliked his Presence here it seemed.  
„This is the Medbay, Doctor Chakwas is well versed in Xenobiology and knows her Stuff, if you are injured, she will be happy to help you.“, he said and greeted the Doctor.  
She was a bit above middle aged, the Turian thought.  
Her hair fully grey and a few Wrinkles here and there in her Face but she looked healthy and fit.  
Chakwas stood from her Chair, walked up to them and held out her Arm in a Turian Greeting, slightly suprising him now, but he grasped her Wrist gently without Hesitation just like she did with his.  
„Good morning Officer Vakarian. I need to examine you to see if you are fit for Duty here.  
Nothing special just the regular Protocol.“, she said, her Voice calm and friendly as she spoke.  
„Please Garrus is fine, no need to be so formal.“, he answered sounding just as friendly.  
„Well I'll leave you to it.“, the Commander said then and turned to leave.  
„If you need me, Garrus, my Room is on the other Side of the Mess and my Door is always open for my Crew. Come to me after you are done here so I can give you a proper Post on the Ship.“  
With that, he left them alone and the Doctor asked him to remove his Armor and the upper part of his Undersuit.  
She eyed the right Side of his Neck and her Expression turned from normal to worried.  
„The Commander told me that Nihlus was your Bondmate, though he didn't understand the full meaning behind that.  
Would you allow me to take a Look at the Mark? It looks rather painful.“, she asked for his Consent.  
Touching a Bondmark without proper Consent was a grave Offense in Turian Culture but the good Doctor clearly knew what she was doing.  
And she was right, it was painful enough that he had probably scratched up half of his Throat and Shoulder without noticing it the Night prior.  
He looked away, not meeting the Womans Eyes but nodded after a while of inner Conflict and sat down on one of the Beds so she could work at it.  
Chakwas still had to press a Button on the side of the Bed to lower it down as his Shoulder was still a bit too high up for her.  
She was after all a rather small Human while he was probably one of the biggest healthy Turians alive.  
Her Mouth thinned to a Line and her Brows furrowed in a Frown as she looked at it without touching.  
Then she took a Pack of MediGel and some Desinfectant.  
„You ripped it up good. Did the Mark open up by itself?“, she asked him as she cleaned the Scratches.  
„...Would explain why it hurt so bad last Night.“, he answered though he wasn't sure about it.  
After she was done with his Bondmark, she prompted him for some Exercises to see his Range of Motion and his overall Fitness, took a Sample of his Blood to test for any Allergys and scanned his Vitals.  
„No scratching on your Shoulder there anymore Garrus.“, she ordered him, he just shrugged not making any promises. Her Glare told him to dare it and he would feel her Wrath.  
He felt like he should not chance it.  
„You should take it easy today so only light duty and no more Strain than what I had put you through just now. Shouldn't be a problem at your first Day here. Tomorrow you are free to join the Squad if needed.“  
She then gave him two small Bottles with Pills, one blue and one yellow.  
„These are Painkillers. Only take one of those before a Mission, they are not meant for Rest and make it easier for you to focus on your Enemys, but they are strong enough to keep your Mind off your Neck for Hours afterwards.  
If your Bondmark hurts too much while there is no Mission for the Day, you can still take one but then make use of the Training Gear down in the Cargo Hold. Shepard made sure there is enough to keep the Crew fit.  
They are addictive if you take more than one a Day or you don't exercise the most of it off, otherwise you should be fine.“, she said and pointed to the yellow Bottle.  
„And those are Antidepressants. I know you do not suffer from Depression normally but the Loss of your Bondmate might do that to you.  
Take one every Morning and you should have an easier Time with coping. If you need someone to talk to about it, me or the Commander will be here for you and everything you say will be kept confidential.“, she explained as she pointed at the blue Bottle.  
He nodded hesitantly and looked at each of the Bottles in his Hands.  
„Will do Doctor...“, he confirmed, then dressed again.

Garrus went to Shepard, right away after he left the Medbay.  
The Commander showed him around in the Mess, where he could find the Dextro Rations – he was suprised these were those of the better Quality – and bottled Water of which he took one immediatly and downed one of the Antidepressants with, only acknowledging the Look the Human gave him with a Shrug.  
They then went to the Elevator down to the Cargo Hold and there he actually saw the Krogan who had tagged along with them on ther Hunt for the Quarian, Wrex was his Name if he recalled correctly.  
He introduced him to most of the Crew, who didn't welcome him at all, with how stiff they suddenly grew around him.  
Shepard then brought him over to the Mako.  
„If you like you can bunk in there. I Requisitioned a extra large Cot for you that should fit in here. You would have some Privacy like that and here no one can annoy you with any racist Bullshit.“, he said, sounding annoyed over his Crews Inability to show some proper Respect.  
„Much appreciated Commander.“, he readily agreed to it.  
Sleeping in the closed off Space of the Mako sounded much better than having to share the Space with the Humans who disliked him simply for his Race.  
The Commander nodded, seemingly satisfied with this Arrangement.  
„Your Dossier said you are good at Engineering, so working on the Mako between Missions and keeping it in top Shape will be your Job.“, Shepard declared then, giving him a wolfish grin.  
„Hmm... I haven't done any engineering kind of work in Years, but I can work it out.“, he answered, though slightly unsure because of that grin.  
„I will hold you to that! But today you can take it easy, settle in, get your Stuff sorted out.“  
The Man then grew quiet and simply looked at him or rather over him from Top to Bottom.  
„I should requisition a better Armor for you though... your C-Sec Armor won't cut it against heavy Enemy Fire.“  
He looked at the Time and grumbled, then looked something up in his OmniTool and back up at him only to just look back down to his OmniTool and then back up at him again.  
„Hmm... Blue would be the obvious Choice here I guess but not the Cobalt C-Sec uses...“, he muttered to himself as he looked at his OmniTool again.  
Garrus was silently watching his new Commander, suprised at his Behaviour and unwilling to interrupt him in his Musings.  
„Alright, I'll handle this and you get settled in. See you later then Garrus.“, the Human then murmured to him distracted by his OmniTool as he walked off.

The first Mission they did for the Council was on Therum to save an Asari called Liara T'Soni.  
She specialized in everything Prothean related and was supposedly capable of helping them.  
Garrus got his first Taste of Shepards driving and deeply considered of aborting the Mission and returning to the Citadel after the third near Dive into hot Lava.  
He was happy to be back on the Normandy safely and didn't even care when Wrex laughed about the fact he'd never seen a Turian this pale.  
Though the Krogan would probably look the same if he had been with them down there, thankfully Tali with her fogged up Helmet also seemed rather sick because of the Experience.  
At least the Asari did infact help Shepard with his Visions and although she could only help him partially, she was eager to stay with them to try again and do more.  
Liara was much more welcomed on the Normandy than any of the other 3 Aliens were.  
They still were the odd 3 out of the whole Crew, except Shepard, Chakwas and Joker who didn't care what they were.  
He had only been here for a few Days and Garrus had to listen again to Williams complain about him being here to the Commander.  
The Man didn't like to hear any of that and then she said something about kissing a Turian.  
„If you'd tell me to kiss that one over there right now I would do it Shepard.“  
„Thanks but no Thanks! I'd rather not!“, he called over loud enough so they could hear him, making Shepard and Wrex chuckle, while resuming to scratch off some left over cooled off Lava from the Makos underside.  
„Did you hear that Commander? He keeps on spying on us. He just confirmed what I've been trying to tell you.“, he heard the Woman hiss much quieter.  
„No, he is not. Turian hearing is several Times better than ours.  
It's not his Fault that we communicate so loudly.  
Have you ever watched 2 Turians talk to each other? You see their Mouths and Mandible move, but you won't hear much at all.  
Turians pretty much scream out loud when talking to us, so we can actually hear them.“  
He snorted at that. Of course Shepard knew that. Why the hell did he know so much about his People?  
„Garrus is no Spy, the same goes for Tali, Wrex and Liara. They are part of the Crew and loyal to the Mission and I have no Reason to believe otherwise.  
I will not listen to another Word of Racism from you Gunnery Chief.“  
„Understood Commander.“, he heard the Woman speak with a Voice that sounded strained, like she wanted to say something more but did not dare to.  
If she were Turian, she would have been punished for that Tone alone.

It was a whole 2 Weeks and a Ton of random Saren unrelated Missions later, when his Father called him in the middle of Dinner.  
He wasn't keen on having the whole Crew listening in on his Patrems probable rant about him being on a Human Vessel.  
Or maybe he might have grown a better social conscience and would offer him some Sympathie?Spirits help him.  
The Officer hurried towards the Elevator, leaving questioning Stares unanswered behind him and accepted the Call while it went down.  
Castis immediate angry Voice sounded in the Air around him, annoying him right away.  
//Garrus, how on Palaven is it, that you were given a Leave of Absence for the Loss of a Bondmate, without ever telling any of us that you were bonded?!  
To a Spectre no less!  
And now I hear you refused that Leave, quit C-Sec and left the Citadel for another Spectre and that one is even worse than that Kryik you bonded with! That one was at least a Turian.  
But this one is a Human! I don't care what your Reasons are, you will return to Palaven immediatly or the Clan-//  
At that Garrus closed the Call with an angry Growl. He should have known that his Patrem would immediatly start to reproach him.  
Was it so hard to give him some nice Words once in a While? Especially right now after he lost his Mate?  
Why did Castis never care about his own Sons feelings?  
Why was he always talking about the Clan and tell him what a Disgrace he was for them?  
Why did he always have to try to change his Life in ways he didn't like?  
He had kept his Bond a Secret exactly for that Reason.  
He had stopped visiting his own Mother and Sister, just so he did not have to be subjected to Castis Vakarian, who acted so high and Mighty in the Vakarian Clans Hierarchy, just because he was the current only General they had left, even though he wasn't even a born Vakarian and simply a Rankbanger in Garrus' Eyes.  
From the very Beginning he had tried to Control his Life.  
'Do it right or don't do it at all.', he had said to him when he was still young. It was the biggest joke he ever told him.  
Castis never acted like that. He didn't even think at all, he just acted without thinking about right and wrong.  
At least if it concerned his own Son.  
And said Son had enough of that.  
He did not return to Dinner that Evening.  
Instead he tried to work off his Anger with the punching Bag in the Normandys small training Area. It did not work.  
When he finished with his Workout and turned around, he was suprised to see Shepard leaning against the Mako with his right Hip watching him with a worried Expression.  
The Man didn't say anything as he came to a stop in front of him, just looked up at him, then pushed off of the Mako with a sigh.  
„You alright there, big Guy? You left Dinner rather abruptly and look like you could murder someone.“, he spoke with a quiet Voice that didn't betray his Worry as his Eyes did.  
„I'm f-“, he started but the Humans deepening Frown stopped him for a Moment.  
The Commander had only been friendly towards him, he had even been able to get him to chuckle a few Times and laugh as well.  
Maybe he could open up a little to him. It wouldn't hurt him after all now would it?  
„N-no Shepard. I'm... not alright.“, he finally relented, feeling kind of guilty of saying this.  
He wouldn't usually dump his Troubles on others, but he felt like not doing that would weigh harder on his Commander for some Reason.  
Though he had only been on the Normandy for less than a Month now, he felt like the Man was giving him preferential Treatment already.  
He came to talk to him at least twice a Day and they talked about anything that came to Mind.  
Mostly his Work by C-Sec and nerding over Guns and Mods or Armor or the overall Condition of the Mako and that he please try to learn how to drive properly.  
„You want to come up to my Room and talk there in private? I might have some Turian Brandy hidden there somewhere to take the Edge of.“, he sounded kind of reliefed as he spoke but still had that worried Look in his Eyes.  
„Yeah...“, Garrus answered. „I... would like that.“

Shepard shoved him on the comfortable looking Couch in his Room, before he walked to his Desk and searched through it then returned to him with a Bottle of Turian Brandy and a Glass.  
The Turian took both then looked at the Bottle approvingly before the Human took it back and filled his Glass with a generous amount „I see you got the good stuff here Shepard.“, he noted.  
„Only the Best for my Crew Garrus.“, the Man laughed.  
He sat down next to him on the Couch with his own Glass of Alcohol in his Hand.  
„So... what had you storming off during Dinner like that?“  
It wasn't easy starting to talk about it. Only after he downed a third Glass of Brandy did he find his Voice and spoke about his Father, how he had always treated him, that he only saw him as a Disgrace to the Clan and never been a Father to him.  
He was just a Tool in the elder Vakarians Eyes and he couldn't take it anymore.  
Garrus told the Commander how he gotten to know Nihlus, but never mentioned the Fact that he also knew Saren quite well. And intimately at that.  
He just couldn't bring himself to say it. He wasn't ready yet to go there.  
Saren had been... well his Lover and the one he thought who would keep his... no, their Mate safe.  
He spoke about the Meaning behind a Turians Bondmark.  
How it affected their Life while both Mates were alive.  
„We become stronger when our Mate is close. Its easier to concentrate and we feel more secure with them around. Pheromones and Hormones flooding our System when we are together, which makes it feel like we can actually feel the Connection we have.  
On the other Hand... When one dies...“  
He swallowed down another Mouthfull of Brandy.  
„When one dies, the Mark reacts accordingly by ripping open or badly hurting and itching.  
If it's really bad you get all of that and even with Painkillers you can't get rid of the Itch.  
It's... an indication that the Connection is... just gone. Severed... for...forever.“, his Voice cracked at the last Word.  
He hadn't forgotten the Pain that he felt, neither physical nor mental, for the Loss of his Mate.  
„I... miss him Shepard. I wonder what would have been if I had come along with him like I had wanted to. Would I have been able to save him?“, he asked with a Voice full of Selfblame and Longing for the dead Spectre, while he looked down at the Floor.  
He felt a warm Hand on the Back of his Neck, just resting there for a Moment before the Hand pulled him down until his Crest rested in the Crook of Shepards Neck.  
It was meant to comfort him and although it wasn't something Turians did it felt nice to be held like that.  
„What do Turians usually do after their Bondmate... dies?“, the Man whispered, carefully rubbing along his Neck without hitting anything sensitive.  
„...Oftentimes they just continue our Life but without a proper Purpose. It's rather just existing instead of living. And sometimes they just... lose their Will to live. We bond for Life, even though we can bond twice, if we only have one Bondmate and that one is taken away from us, it is... devastating.“  
„So they commit suicide?“  
„No... we... we wither away. Slowly suffering until we simply fall asleep and never wake up again.“  
He felt two Arms go around his Neck on the Inside of his Cowl and press him closer to the Human.  
His Face was stuffed now in his Neck and his Nose was assaulted by his Smell, but not in a bad way.  
Shepards smell was entirely unique, he couldn't find anything else he could associate with it.  
It was oddly soothing. The Smell, the cool Feeling he got wherever the Man thouched him.  
But at the same Time he felt all his Pain bubble up again, threatening to burst at any moment.  
Within a few Seconds he couldn't hold back the Keen that wanted to escape him.  
Shepard didn't move or speak at all, just kept on with his idle Scratching along the back of his Neck.  
Maybe, just maybe, he hoped, he could find his Way out of thise Hole that he was currently in.  
One Hand wandered to the top of his Crest and stroke along the Blades of his Fringe.  
Again he didn't feel any suprise when he realised that the Man knew exactly what he needed to do to help calm him down.  
He was safe here in the Commanders Arms. Safe to properly grief.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the Comments and the Kudos!  
> I really apreciate it!
> 
> I fully utilized the Sunday yesterday and this Morning and got this Chapter out.  
> But now I'm stuck with a late shift week so I dunno how much Time I'll have to write the next one.  
> Well anyway I hope you'll enjoy!^^

Garrus awoke on a soft Surface he didn't know, but it felt so much more comfortable than the hard Cot he used to sleep on, maybe he could sleep some more here.  
He snuggled back into the Blanket that smelled a lot like Shepard had.  
That was when awareness kicked in and he immediatly sat up to look around and found himself to still be in the Commanders Cabin and on his Couch.  
The Human was nowhere to be seen though and he felt weirdly well rested.  
This Couch was good for retaining Heat and oddly enough the Temperature in the Room was also higher than as he remembered.  
With a Look on his OmniTool he saw that he had actually slept in.  
It was well past the Time where his Shift started and already aproaching Midday.  
Why didn't Shepard wake him up?  
Spirits it had been years since he last overslept.  
After getting up and putting the Blanket back on the Bed, he left the Cabin, trying to be stealthy and was happy that Alenko wasn't on his Workstation, though he did saw a few other Crewmembers in the Mess, though they had their Backs turned on him and did not notice him as he fled to the Elevator.  
Spirits, he felt like a Teenager again who had to flee in a Hurry from this one neihgborhood Girls Bedroom while it was still dark in order not to get caught by her Parents.  
At least he could get back to Work now, even though Williams would probably stare Daggers at him for being late.

The following days they ran by a few Planets and went down there to search for some Ressources and took care of some Alliance related Tasks, nothing where they really needed to use their Weapons, but by now Garrus understood why the Commander had grinned at him as he assigned him to the Mako.  
The Man couldn't drive like a normal Person to save his Life and the Mako suffered from his Abuse.  
It was simply a Mystery that it had survived until now and the Turian had been working hard enough because of that to actually forget why he even joined the Crew.  
Finally they reached Feros and he was rudely reminded again down there.  
The Colony acted weird, the Geth came in and attacked it and then there was a huge Plant with tons of Tentacles that could spit out weird green looking Humans that only grabbed onto one of them and either exploded then and covered them in very sticky Goo to make them nearly immobile or tried to Bite them to death.  
He liked neither of those Options.  
And then there was that Asari that came out of... of something and it looked like she was either born or puked out of it.  
Garrus actually felt sorry for Alenko when he turned pale and actually gagged at the Sight, he felt the same way but thankfully he had been able to control himself better.  
Of course the Commander was all calm and talked with her like nothing happened at all and even went ahead and done a Mindmeld with her for a Prothean Cipher.  
He felt like his Armor would never be clean again after this Mission was over and was thankful to get out of it.  
It still was his old C-Sec Armor and he knew Shepard had ordered a new one for him, though with his Measures it would take a while till it was done and then they would have to go back to the Citadel for it.  
Now he wished they would go there again to see if it was ready instead of Noveria.  
The Commander had already told him he would be on the Groundteam there and he was not happy to be wearing that old well worn Armor for those cold Temperatures.  
He changed out his MediGel Dispenser Mod for a Heat Generator Mod in it and growled in Frustration that it only had two Modslots in it.  
The MediGel Dispenser had been the obvious Choice to switch out, given the Fact that MediGel wouldn't safe him if he was killed because he had no Shield Generator in his Armor.

The last Mission on Feros had showed him again how ruthless Saren had become.  
Yes, he had been ruthless ever since he got to know him, but this?  
This was a new High even for him.  
Garrus sat next to the Mako on the Floor with his Back leaning up against it, reminiscing about the old Times with both Saren and Nihlus, looking at Pictures on his OmniTool with all three of them or the other two alone or together, a sad smile gracing the Line of his Mandibles.  
A sigh escaped him, nearly inaudible and he did not notice that he was being watched.  
He remembered that one Day Nihlus agreed to bond with him, or rather Saren had agreed to it because Nihlus had not wanted to without his other Mates Consent.  
They were happy then, even the old Spectre slightly smiling on the Picture as he and his Protégé were fiercly hugged and lifted in the Air by an ecstatic Garrus, both of them smushed together and 4 Legs struggling and kicking in the Air.  
He was about to scroll to the next Picture as he noticed someone standing in front of him, so he looked up, seeing Ashley Williams standing there, looking for all the World like she had cought him red Handed.  
Unhurriedly he switched off his OmniTool and stood up, knowing exactly what she was about to say.  
„I knew it!“, she declared loud enough for the whole Room to hear, gathering everyones Attention, especially the 4 other Humans down here.  
„You were purposely hiding yur Affiliation to Saren and are spying on us! I saw those Pictures clearly!  
You are Friends with him! You are just another Turian who stands with his own Kind no matter what it would cost the Galaxy!  
I don't know why the Commander even brought you here, but you are a Risk to this Mission and I will put an End to this right now you Traitor!“  
How dare she say these things?! His anger easily visible with his spread Mandibles, showing her his Teeth in a distinctive Turian Gesture of Threat.  
„You know nothing Williams!“, he defended himself and took a Step closer to her, looming over her.  
„You just saw an old Picture of somewhere in my Past where I had been L-...F-Friends with Saren and Nihlus, for that Matter!  
He killed Nihlus! Of course I am here! Of course I want to know why he killed him!  
Do you expect me to sit around at Home crying all Day long without actually doing anything?!  
I don't know what your Problem is with me, but I have done nothing! I say: Nothing! To deserve for you to continually antagonize me like this!!“  
He'd nearly slipped up there and called Saren his Lover, but the Human hadn't noticed it seemingly.  
She actually was scared of how he looked that Moment but she shook her Head and gnashed her Teeth at him, then made to grab the Pistol on her Hip.  
Garrus hadn't thought she would actually try to shoot him then and was suprised to suddenly have the Barrel of her Pistol shoved in his Face, though she did not shoot, she did not dare to.  
„You don't have the Guts to do that Williams!“, he mocked her then, seeing how Wrex, who had been watching them with an amused Smirk on his Face the whole Time, get serious and stalking towards them as quiet as a Krogan in full Armor could, but he was 'happily' distracting the Female. The other Humans looked at them flabberghasted and not daring to intervene.  
She then kicked him in the Waist and shoved the Gun under his Jaw, as he bowed over with a Hiss of Pain, to threaten him further and snarled.  
„Shut up! I've had enough of your Kind!  
You all act so high and mighty and just want to rid us Humans out of the Face of the Galaxy!  
You are no different.“  
The Pistol was shoved harder against his Jaw and he dared not make a single Move, but it did not stop him from running his Mouth.

Almost with a flirtatious Voice he spoke.  
„Now now Girl... What would Shepard think if you shoot his favorite Turian on board?  
Do you really think he would believe you?  
Do you really think just because I don't tell you anything, that he doesn't know of my 'Affiliation' with Saren?“  
Her Eyes narrowed at him and she watched his Face so closely as he spoke, that she didn't notice his Hand slowly creeping up to her Gun, actually pushing the Button to put it's Safety on.  
He smirked then, held his Hand out towards the Krogan who was two thirds of the Way at them, and pointed towards the Elevator, it was already moving.  
„Shepard wouldn't like it, if he just walked in here and saw you with your Pistol stuck to my Jaw like that.  
I wonder what he would actually do.  
Would he put you in your Place? Would he throw you off the Normandy? Ah no... he wouldn't. After all he needs all the help that he can get, can't get picky here, can he?“, he mocked again.  
She still hadn't noticed the Elevator coming down, but Wrex had after he had pointed towards it and slowed his Steps.  
Williams pushed him back then against the Mako. Quite the Feat as he had to weigh at least twice as much as her even without his Armor.  
Right now he wished he was wearing it, even if it was still not clean, it at least had a Shield while right now he had, well not nothing but also not something he was willing to use in this Setting.  
The Pistol was again shoved under his Jaw right as the Elevator door opened and the Commanders angy Voice boomed through the Room.  
„What the fucking Hell is going on here?!“, he shouted as he sprinted towards the Scene.  
He had already known what was happening, probably Jokers fault. Bless him.  
Williams was caught of guard, it was visible on her Face for just a single Moment and Garrus would have missed it, if he wasn't watching her so closely.  
„H-he is a Spy! I have Proof that he is Friends with Saren! He is working for him!“, she defended herself.  
„Oh? Suddenly you have Proof? And where did you get that from in the last 10 Minutes?  
All you saw was some old Pictures from my Past.  
That suddenly is Proof enough to make me a Spy for Saren?  
Don't make me laugh Williams.“, he mocked her again, earning himself another hard Shove with her Pistol into his Jaw.  
By now he was sure it would Bruise pretty badly there, this Woman really was stronger than she looked.  
„Williams! Get this Weapon off of him or I'll throw you out the Airlock myself!“, Shepard ordered, Voice filled with Anger.  
She looked at him, Face full of Hate, shoved the Weapon in harder again, then removed it and took a forcefull Step back with a loud huff.  
Garrus immediatly sank back against the Mako and slid down to the Ground, all Tension leaving him.  
Even with the Safety on, he felt like she could have broken his Neck with the Way she shoved that Pistol up his Jaw.  
He didn't catch the Commanders worried Look towards him, but heard that he admonished Williams but not what was said.  
He wasn't even allowed to reminisce in Peace.  
Was even threatened to be killed because of that.  
It was so laughable. So laughable that he wanted to do just that.  
But he didn't. He couldn't.  
Garrus tried again to listen what the Commander was saying to keep himself from going crazy.  
„As a Spectre I hold the Authority to degrade you.  
You are hereby a Staff Seargant and unfit to work with the Squadmates Weapons.  
You will still be needed in the Groundsquad, but are not allowed to carry any Weapons without supervision and my explicit Consent.  
Your new Position will be up in the CIC, report to Pressley to show you what to do. Dismissed!“  
The Woman was so shocked over the hard Punishment, that she was actually frozen in Place for a few Seconds, she then gathered her Stuff from not her Workstation and left the Cargo Hold.  
Shepard looked down to him as he looked up and offered him a sad smile.  
Again that Night they talked in the Privacy of the Captains Quarters.  
„What exactly happened down there Garrus?“, the Man asked him as he handed him a Glass of last times Brandy he had not finished.  
„I don't really know.  
I was just... sitting there, the Mako was done and ready for another Mission and I was feeling off.  
One Moment I'm looking at some Pictures of my Past with Nihlus and Saren, the next she was standing in front of me, accusing me of being a Spy and a Traitor because I had been Friends with Saren in my Past.  
I told her she had no Right to say those Things and that I haven't done anything to deserve how she treated me since the Start.  
Then she pulled her Gun on me, kicked me in the Waist and shoved it into my Jaw.  
I was able to distract her enough to put the Safety back onto her Pistol without her noticing.  
She shoved me into the Mako, pressed that Gun harder into me and that's pretty much when you came in.  
She didn't even think about giving me a Chance to explain, all she thought about was how it would look if you entered while she had that Gun raised on me.“, he explained, then huffed out a Laugh.  
„I doubt she would have shot me. She is a Coward especially in Regards to you Shepard.  
She knew you wouldn't have let it slide unpunished even if she was right.“  
He looked up to the Human who was still standing next to him when no answer came.  
Then he made a weird Sound through his Nose and it looked like he was trying not to laugh.  
„You actually pushed the Safety back on without her noticing? How'd you even do that?“, he asked and sat next to him then.  
„Uh... she was just watching my Face so intently from up close that she didn't see my Hand moving there. I don't really understand myself.  
I must say though, I didn't like smelling her Breath and definitely can do without that for the rest of my Life.“  
A Shudder went through him at the Memory, making his Commander laugh at him.  
„Well Shep if you are done asking me questions now, can I ask you one? Or maybe two?“, he tried to change the Subject.  
When the Human nodded his Consent he mulled over his Question real quick and decided about the one he was the most Curious about.  
„It didn't really suprise me for some Reason, but why exactly do you know so much about my People?“  
He had expected that Question by the Look that he gave him.  
„I uh... guess start at the Beginning.  
I lived on Mindoir before it was raided by Batarians, got taken by them, got myself a shiny Serial Number and a Control Ship from them and was sold as a working Slave.  
I was bought by a Turian Mistress with some other People. Some Terminus Lords Wife or something.  
Well she didn't buy us to mistreat us or use us till we were burned out and drop dead, but to actually set us free after we worked for a time in her Compound.  
Like working off a Debt that we owned her.  
She did put great value on Mannerism though, so we were taught to respect the Turian Culture.  
I learned to talk more quietly around Turians back then and also what Bodyparts I am free to touch and where it would basically be groping them.  
After working for her for 2 and a half Years she set me free and yeah...  
Thats were I learned most of my Knowledge about your People.“  
Garrus didn't really know what to say about that and it must have shown on his Face, because Shepard took pity on him.  
„And if you want to know why I got this Brandy there.  
I uh had invited someone to my Cabin last time we were on the Citadel but they stood me up without a Word and I was stuck with that Bottle.“, he scratched the Back of his Head looking as awkward as that had sounded.  
„I'm kind of more suprised by the Fact that I'm not suprised by you wanting to dabble into my People.“, he joked but still meant it.  
He leaned forward to the amused but still slightly awkward Man and lowered his Voice, just to tease him.  
„Or did you already get a Taste? Turians are said to be the best Lovers in the Galaxy.  
And the kinkiest Species of all.“  
Shepards Ears actually turned a little red and he saw a Wave of Goosebumps, though he did not know what these where, go along the Mans Arms at the Sound of his Voice.  
But before the Human could answer him, he pushed off the Couch and walked towards the Door.  
Turning back once more before he left, feeling much better now, but not wanting to end up sleeping in on that comfortable Couch again.   
He grinned at him as he spoke.  
„Thanks Shepard. I'm glad your the commanding Officer here... It makes things... easier to cope with for me.“

The Trouble greeting them in Noverias Harbour could not be called anything more than an Annoyance.  
First the Greeting then the needless running around for anybody who they talked to and then last, but not least Lorik actually telling them they missed Saren just so.  
Shepard had to pry Garrus away from the older Turian as he easily lifted him up by his Collar, growling at him.  
„I can fucking smell him on you Lorik!“, he snarled after his Commander was standing between him and the other Turian to shield him.  
„Did he blow your Mind, huh?! Was he calling Nihlus Name while he did?! Was it fun to be a his Toy?!“  
A slight Cough from Lorik, then a huff followed his Taunts, then a Smirk.  
„Yes it was fun. He was very upfront with me with what this Liason would mean to him and I was fine with it, but no, he did not speak about Nihlus. Well maybe a little but mostly... he spoke about you, Garrus.  
Would have loved it for you to be in my Place. He wants you there with him. Next to him.“  
Neither Liara nor Shepard could belief what they heard, while he snarled again and wanted to get back to the other Male, strangle him or rip him to Shreds with merely his Talons, but his two Alien Friends stopped him.  
„We are leaving! Now!“, the Commander ordered while they pushed the livid Turian back and away.  
When they were in a shadowy Corner out of Sight and Liara putting up a biotic Barrier to make sure no one could hear them, they watched how Garrus put 3 long Gouges into the Metalwall next to them with a loud Snarl.  
They had never seen him so openly angry like this and Shepard was about to second guess his Decision with Williams, but he also believed his Trust was well placed in the Turian, so he asked him, even if he would have liked a different Setting for this Topic, but he couldn't be picky right now.  
„What did he mean with that Garrus? Why would Saren want you like Lorik said?“, he would'nt need to repeat all of it for his Friend to understand.  
„I don't care Shepard! How can he say that? How?!  
Saren has no right to want me with him!  
He killed our Mate! He killed whatever he and I had shared just between the two of us!“, he snarled clawing on the Wall some more to somehow relief his Anger.  
„He betrayed us! He promised me he would keep him safe! He was bonded to him! He shouldn't have been able to do it! But he did! How?! HOW?!“  
Another set of Gouges added to the others, this one especially deep.  
The Turian was breathing hard enough that his hole Body shook with every Breath he took, then he started to deflate, anger gone just as suddenly as it had come.  
He faced the Wall, his Crest resting against the Wall and his Fingers resting in the Gouges he had carved there.  
„Nihlus and he was everything I had left! He was supposed to come back to me after Eden Prime. He had promised!  
We had wanted to make it fully official. To carry it into the open. Our Bond.  
He had wanted to get past the Restrictions my Father had put on my Files. We wanted to travel together as a Pair of Spectres.  
We had planned so far ahead. We wanted to get Saren to agree to bond with me too.  
A true Triad. Strong and unbeatable.  
We had dreams...“, his Voice grew more and more timid the more he spoke.  
His Shoulders shook repeatedly as he tried not to Keen out loudly.  
Neither Shepard nor Liara knew what to say, so they let him rant.  
Another loud Snarl together with a metallic Whine from the Wall sounded, as he suddenly turned around, his Eyes immediatly fixed intently on the Commander.  
„I don't care what it will take Shepard! When we face Saren, I want to be there! I want his Head! Can we go now and kill something?!“  
„Uh... yeah just let me get Wrex down here and we'll be on our Way...“, Shepard agreed, actually sounding unsure for just a Moment.  
His Turian Friend was huge after all and right now he made all his Alarmbells ring with his Behaviour.  
Better to get some additional Brawn to help them out if needed, he thought.

Garrus cursed this Planet, this Cold, these weird Creatures, this old Armor that just wasn't designed to properly keep him warm.  
It was created for everyday Life on the Citadel, not extreme Temperatures like Noveria.  
The Heat Generator was thankfully working, but the old C-Sec Armor just had too many weaknesses and wasn't designed to retain Heat.  
There was a constant Chill going through his Body as they walked through the Peak-15 Base that didn't help much with his already extremely bad Mood.  
It was slightly better when they entered the Facility where some People hid from those Creatures as it meaned his Body could warm up again and his Heat Generator got a few Moments to reload on Energy.  
But his 'Luck' ran out soon again during the Fight against Benezia, his doubt to take Liara along for this Mission now proving to be well placed, as the Asari hesitated against her Mother.  
She was frozen in Place and Garrus protected here by shoving her, probably with way too much Force, out of the Way of an incoming Throw by one of Benezias Asaris.  
While Liara woke from her stupor because of that, the Turian was thrown back through the Room, actually impacting Wrex, who had his Back turned to them and nearly tripped.  
The old Krogan was just about to turn around and punch whatever had hit him with his Shotgun, when he saw his Turian Friend picking himself back up from the Ground, looking quite wobbly on his Legs.  
Looking at the Scene near Liara he could guess what had happened there and why he had some kind of Turian Mess next to him.  
„You arlight there Whelp?“, he asked and steadied him with a Hand, while shooting at one of the Asari Commandos with his other.  
„Ah yes. I'm just wonderful Wrex. Sorry for coming onto you like that, next time I swear I'll buy you a Drink first. Or ten.“, he joked, but it came out flat and full with Emotion that was seemingly misplaced for this Situation.  
If he wasn't so fond of the Turian he wouldn't have cared at all, but he could relate to the Whelps Feelings.  
It was no Secret on the Normandy that Garrus was fighting with the Loss of his Bondmates, even if most of the Humans were ignorant of that Term, he was not.  
„How about I buy you a Drink first. Or ten. When we are back on the Citadel?“, he asked instead, fully serious.  
Garrus huffed and shook his Head, finally being able to put his rattled Brain back into Place.  
„I'm actually inclined to accept that Invitation Wrex. Maybe let Shepard join.“  
„Hah! Of course! Otherwise he'll get jealous!“, he barked out loud and released him to finally fully return to the Task of decimating the local Asari Commandos.  
The Turian looked around for his Assaultrifle that he hadn't been able to hold on to, when that Asari had thrown him, then joined right back in on the Fun.

„N-no m-m-more c-cold P-pl-plan-net-ts-s f-fo-or m-me.“  
Garrus viciously trembled and hugged his Wasit to try to keep his internal Organs Warm three thermal Blankets wrapped around him.  
His Heat Generator had not survived the impact with Wrex and now they were stuck on one of the Trams of Peak 15.  
It had stopped working midway and there was no way for them to get off here and just walk the way back because they were some 100 Metres above Ground and the Windows blown out, so the Wind was bringing in the Cold and Snow.  
Shepard and Liara were doing their Best to repair it while their Turian Tech expert was incapable of helping them other than givin vague Directions.  
His Hands were trembling and his Vision was getting worse by the Second.  
„Garrus I promise, I won't ever drag you on a cold Planet like this again, but you have to survive this, so I can keep that Promise!“, the Human shouted over the Howling Wind.  
He shook his Head and lost the Strength in his Legs so he sat down weakly. At this Rate he wasn't gonna make it. Who was he kidding...  
Even if they were able to get the Tram to work again, he wouldn't survive it.  
He was already in his Deathbed.  
Just vaguely he noticed his upper Armor being removed, but the sudden spike of Cold against his Carapace brought him right back to full Wakefullness with a Hiss.  
And then his Back suddenly was pressed against something really warm.  
„Sp-spir-rits, Wr-wrex?“, he stuttered, still needing to heat back up.  
„Can't let you die now, can I? I ain't no big help with repairing this thing but I got enough Heat for the both of us.“, the old Krogan rumbled behind him and put his Chestplate over Garrus Torso, then all three of their Thermal Blankets over it.  
„And my Heat Generator is still working. No point in having one of us die to such a dumb Reason.“  
„Y-yeah...“, he mumbled. „Th-thanks.“  
Even with Wrex sharing his Body Heat with him, he still felt unnaturally tired and slumped back against the Krogans Front.  
„You ain't thinking about still dyin' on me here are you Pup?“  
„No. Just really sleepy all of a sudden.“, he slurred, his shivering almost gone by now.  
The Tram came back to Life at that Moment, Shepard and Liara both cheering for a Moment then hurriedly turning to the Turian who was barely awake now.  
„Shepard. I'm already keeping him warm but he still ain't getting better.“, the Krogan complained, not knowing what else he could do.  
Liara wordlessly scanned him and sighed in Relief but also Regret.  
„He's got a Concussion, thats why he has trouble to stay awake. Let him sleep, it should help him get better.“  
„Let's get him back to the Normandy as fast as we can then so Chakwas can take care of him.“, Shepard said, also sounding reliefed.  
A Concussion wasn't good, but still much better than his Friend freezing to death.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I uh had wanted for this to be a slow burn but I could not resist.  
> I will still leave the Tag for it though because anything that happened here is uh still platonic.  
> In other words guys.  
> NSFW AND IT WILL START KINDA WHEN SHEP AND GARRUS ENTER A (uuuuuh what was it again? a Bathroom?) UH YEAH A BATHROOM!  
> If you don't want to read that, yeah you can skip the rest of the Chapter from the Moment they enter a Bathroom together...
> 
> I put my Heart and Soul into this Smut!  
> It kind of bugged me for a while already and I had it kinda written out already and for some reason i fully scrapped it again and rewrote it and fitted it into here and yep. I like it more now.  
> I suck with writing Smut just for the sake of Smut.  
> So never gonna be a "Plot what Plot Porn without Plot" kind of Writer I guess.  
> It's fiiiiiine.  
> It was fun.  
> Oh and everybody Merry Christmas!  
> Much Love to all of you and Tons of Health, have a good Time with your Familys and keep safe!

The three of them where hastily returning to the Mako they had used to get to Peak 15 with Garrus slung over the Krogans Shoulder.  
Wrex had carried him around for a while in Bridal style with his Chestplate on top of him, to keep him warmer, but after they came across some more Rachni, Shepard ordered him to put their Armor back on properly, to avoid getting hurt by the Rachnis Acid.  
Now though his Temperatur was dropping fast again while they were running through the hefty Blizzard and he actually started to curse at the Human.  
„Why the fucking Hell did you park so far away Shepard!  
We could have just left the Mako in front of the Door!  
I told you so earlier!“  
He at least had felt kind of reassured by the Tremble in the Turians Body reaching him through the Armor, but when it stopped suddenly, he cursed loudly again and tried his Best to run faster.  
They finally reached the Mako, Wrex hastily opened the Door to it and sitting Garrus down in one of the Seats, dislodging his own Chestplate again and ranking up the Heat Generator then also dislodging the Turians Chestplate and pushing his bigger Set onto him.  
„He's barely Breathing.“, he growled out loudly and helped Liara to put the Thermal Blanket around him.  
Shepard started the Mako while they took care of the Turian and drove them back towards the Harbour.  
Wrex sat back after Garrus' Breath got better and sighed in Relief.  
He liked Garrus, even if he was a Turian and didn't want him to die like this.  
It would just be a dumb way to die and he felt like Garrus could at least be granted a glorious Death in Battle.  
There were just a few hundred Metres away from the Harbour when the Turian stirred again and looked up at particularly nothing, his Eyes looking empty first, but getting clearer soon, then he groaned shoving the Chestplate and Blankets from himself.  
„Garrus calm down you need to stay warm.“, Liara said as she tried to put the Blankets back around him, but the Turian shoved them off of him complaining about it being too hot and needing to cool down.  
Wrex frowned at that and let the Asari speak to the Turian while he opened his OmniTool to search for something.  
They reached the Harbour and left the Mako, Wrex again carrying the Turian in Bridal Style, Liara and Shepard each one of their Chestplates, all three of them hurrying back to the Ship, the Commander speaking through the Comms, telling Chakwas to prepare.  
Garrus was practically Wheezing now, his Body heating up way too much with no way of cooling down on its own as his Breath, a Turians usual Way to cool down, was way too shallow.  
„What's going on now?“, the Commander asked as he run next to the Krogan, looking very concerned.  
The Turian had started to babble, aparently seeing Nihlus and being happy to see him again.  
„If what I researched just now is true, then he's currently dying!“, he hissed out through his Teeth.  
Garrus was getting quiet again right as they entered the Normandy, the Krogan not missing a Beat to skip the Deconcycle and running through the Ship into the Medbay.  
The Doctor already waiting there for them and shooing him out right after he put the Turian gently down on one of the Beds.

The Krogan had left Shepard with Liara in the Mess Hall, too pissed at everything to talk with anybody.  
The Asari kept him Company and tried to soothe his Selfblame.  
„Wrex was right, I should have parked the damn Mako right in front of that Door!“, he shoved his Hands into his Hair in a frustrated Manner.  
„Or better yet not taken Garrus with us. He told me his Armor wasn't suited for the Cold and his Species wasn't good with it either.“  
Liara layed her Hand on his Shoulder and lightly shook her Head.  
„No Shepard. If anything it's my fault.  
I was frozen in Place when we faced of against my Mother and he took a Throw in my Place.  
If you hadn't decided to take Wrex with us too he would be dead now, so you saved him with that Decision.  
You couldn't have known that leaving the Mako so far away from the Base would come back and bite us.“  
He sighed and shook his Head.  
„It doesn't Matter anymore. He sounded so... happy when he spoke about Nihlus there.  
Like genuingly reliefed.  
Even if Chakwas gets him through he might just decide to end it then.  
He just lost his Mate... again.“  
The Asari looked at him, horrified of what he was saying.  
„I don't thin he would do that.  
He is stronger than that Shepard,“, she said, fully believing in that Statement.  
They didn't speak anymore after that and just sat there, waiting for any News of their Friends Condition.  
After 3 full Hours Chakwas came out of the Medbay, signaling for Shepard to join her to talk.

Inside the Medbay Garrus was lying on one of the Beds on his left Side, to keep his Fringe and Legspurs from getting hurt, connected to a few Devices, a breathing Mask on his Face, sleeping with a Frown on his Face.  
He was still breathing hard and a few cooling Pads were strategically placed on his Body.  
„He barely made it Shepard.“, Chakwas said bluntly, looking him straight in the Eyes.  
She went on and explained to him in Detail, what the Hypothermia slowly did to his Body and how it tried to Cope with it and the Concussion.

Shepard was devastated. He mechanically told Joker to set Course to the Citadel, did a Mission Debrief with the whole Groundsquad and did his Rounds as usual.  
The Krogan was more grumpy than usual, only interested about the Turians well being.  
„Chakwas explained to me the 5 Stages of Turian Hypothermia. She said he was already at the middle of Stage 4, the Shutdown of inner Organs and his Body went to Shock after you heated him back up.  
Together with the Concussion, his Brain couldn't keep up with anything anymore and made his Body overheat without stop.  
It's still doing just that and he took a bit of damage to his Lungs because of the cold Air and because of that he can't breath right and cool down on his own.“, he explained, sounding much less miserable than he felt.  
Wrex had been on good Terms with Garrus since they first entered the Normandy.  
They often laughed together and also worked well together down on Missions.  
It had been somewhat of a suprise to Shepard at first, but the old Krogan had told him once he held no Grudge at the Turians in general, only against those that thought of the Genophage as the right Choice.  
Garrus was not one of those and thus they befriended easy enough.  
It also helped that Wrex seemed to understand the Turians Grief a lot more than the rest of the Crew.  
„He might not wake up again.“, he sighed, shoving his Fingers through his Hair.  
The Krogan stood taller at this and growled at him.  
He pointed at Shepard with one Finger and took a Step closer, a deep Frown on his Face.  
„If he dies Shepard, I'll remember that.  
He deserved a honorable Death! Not this Bullshit that you caused him to suffer through!“  
„I know...“, he agreed, but also a Question formed in his Head.  
„Why do you care so much for a Turian?“, he asked it.  
„None of your fucking Business Human.“, he growled, leaning back against the Wall again.  
He was done talking now and openly showed that, with a Nod the Commander left the Krogan be.

He was greeted by a multitude of rythmic Beeps, when he woke up, his Chest hurting as he tried to take in a deeper Breath, causing him to cough a few times violently.  
Someone rushed to his Side and helped to soothe him, but his Lungs were aching after he calmed down.  
His Eyes barely registered Shapes but at least his Hearing was working properly.  
The Person who had rushed to help him had been Chakwas, which meant he was back on the Normandy.  
„You need to stay calm Garrus.“, she told him.  
She explained that the Cold Air had damaged his Lungs, but they were already well on the Way to heal, he should not yet try to take in deeper Breaths even if he felt the Need to do so as it could damage them again.  
She would also like to do some Tests to see if everything was working as it should be.  
He saw her doing something in front of his Face but he still couldn't really see.  
„How many Fingers am I holding up Garrus.“, she asked him.  
He hesitated, trying to make his Eyes focus but the vague Shapes didn't get better.  
„Ih cahn't rheallyh seeh...“, he spoke but shallow Breath made it sound awkward.  
„Iht's juhst vhagueh shahpes fhor meh.“  
The Doctor then changed her Approach and shone a light in one, then the other Eye, making him groan out in discomfort, then lightly cough again.  
He heard the Noise of a MedicTool doing a Scan, then the Womans thoughtful hum.  
She then sighed with a Tone in it that he did not know the Meaning of, but it sounded more positiv than negativ, so he was hopeful.  
„It's going to go away soon Garrus.  
All you need is proper medical Care and Rest and you should be fine again soon.“, she said then, a smile evident in her Voice.  
She sounded sincere.  
„I would ask you a few Questions, but I don't want you to stress out your Lungs by answering.  
And I know, you also have Questions, but know this, the Mission was a Success, everyone except you were fine, they all want you to get better and the Way it looks in your Data, you will make a full recovery withing the next 2 Weeks if you Rest up properly.  
I would like to sedate you, to make you Rest, but I can't due to your Concussion so I hope you agree with me to try to get some Sleep.  
Tomorrow your Lungs should be good enough to breath easier.“  
He nodded and earnestly tried to sleep, but his Thoughts wandered off.  
Nihlus, he had seen him, he remembered, he had been there.  
The more he thought about it, the more he remembered.  
Wrex had carried him, Nihlus had been running next to the Krogan and smiled at him.  
His Mate had told him to make him proud. To keep living. To not be too hard on Saren.  
But... how could he not be?  
'He's not himself. It was not his Decision. It was made for him. Just try to save him. And if you can't, then make it quick. Like he did for me.'  
How could he have known that? Why did he even see him? Did he hallucinate this?  
Had Nihlus' Spirit come to save him from going crazy because of this Burden that was his Death and Sarens Betrayal?  
Spirits he missed him. He missed him so much.  
When he finally found his Way to sleep, he dreamed of Nihlus and the Future they could never have.  
It was sweet and he never wanted to wake up.  
But at the same Time, he knew it was just a Dream and thus... it was a Nightmare and he just wanted to wake up. Desperately.

„...oke up?“, he heard Shepards Voice somewhere in the Room the next time he came back to Consciousness.  
„Yes, I had not informed you at the Time because his Brainwaves collapsed afterward and he fell into a deeper form of Sleep.  
I couldn't detect any changes until an Hour ago. I believe he is about to wake up again.  
His Body has properly recovered by now, so he should be able to properly see and speak now.“, Chakwas calm Voice explained.  
It was this Moment he chose to draw in a deeper Breath and how satisfying that Feeling was with filling his Lungs to the Brim with Air, like he had not done that in Years.  
Spirits it felt good.  
He opened his Eyes, the vague Shapes he had seen the last Time he had woken up now replaced by clear Lines and Movements.  
The slight Movements he made seemingly enough to alert the 2 Humans to him.  
„Garrus?“, Shepard near whispered as he walked up to his Bed.  
He nodded and held out his Hand to the Human, who happily grabbed it and gently squeezed.  
„You alright there Buddy?“, he asked, sounding genuingly reliefed.  
„I am now.“, he spoke quietly, leaving the Statement intentionally ambitious.  
The Commander raised a Brow at that, but also grinned at him.  
Chakwas had started to do her Job in scanning him and looking at his Data and actually looking satisfied with it.  
She then started to ask him Questions, like what it was that he remembered last of the Mission, if there was still any discomfort, if he'd seen or heard anything out of Place that should not have been there.  
He remembered parts of the Discussion they had with Benezia after they had won against her, though they made no Sense to him as it was very spotty, the Rachni Queens release and after that only Cold.  
The only discomfort he felt was his Stomach trying to digest his Gizzard and he told them about Nihlus, that he had seen him, what he had said.  
He also spoke about the Dream he had.  
When Shepard asked him, if he would rather go back into that dream, he scoffed.  
„That is not a Place I want to return to Shepard.  
It had Nihlus in it yeah, but it was not living, it was simply existing in a Space with no Hope for Happiness, I couldn't feel him, taste him, smell him.  
I could see him, hear him, yes.  
But I could not have him, that Place was a Nightmare, Shepard.  
It had no Future.“, he explained.

His Body felt like a Mess, he was tired and he felt a constant Chill go through his Body, now more than ever.  
The Normandy was too cold for his Liking even before Noveria, but now it was even more obvious to him.  
Wrex had started to growl at Shepard when the Human was near him.  
Garrus had asked him, but the old Krogan just shook his Head and did not answer.  
It wasn't until they arrived on the Citadel a few Days later that the Commander confronted him with it, that the Turian got his Answer.  
„You nearly killed the Pup with your Stupidity. I ain't letting that happen again.“, he growled at the Human.  
„And you feel like he needs your Protection? Don't you think he is old and strong enough to take care of himself?“, the Commander shot back.  
„He is not a Pup or a Whelp or whatever it is that you always call him.  
He's a full adult Turian Man and fully capable of deciding for himself who he can and cannot trust.“  
The Krogan barked a loud Laugh at that.  
„He's still very young for Turian Standarts Shepard. He already lost his Mate.  
His own CLan shunned him and he would hold on to anybody now who would offer him help.  
He is lost and naive and I will protect him from landing in another Situation where you made a bad Call.“  
Garrus could not believe his Ears.  
First of all how did Wrex knew about his Clan, second this sounded a lot like... Spirits.  
„Wrex.“, he called over from his Position by the Mako towards the other two.  
„Let it go. Shepard made a Mistake, he apologized multiple Times already, it won't happen again.“, he said as he walked over to them.  
The Krogan harrumped and looked away.  
„And I'm still thankful for your Help on Noveria, but that still doesn't make you my Dad, even if you act like that.“, he teased him, earning himself a stuttering growl and the Krogans cold Shoulder.  
Garrus motioned for the Commander to walk with him.  
Shepard looked at him skeptical about all that, making him laugh a little.  
„Seems like someone is getting a little attached to me.“, he answered then.  
„Got any Plans for your Shore Leave yet? Except annoying the Council and running around doing tasks for anybody who complains about whatever in your vicinity of course.“, he asked with a light Chuckle as the Man shoved his Shoulder with his Hand in mocked Contempt.  
„Oh there was this Turian I owe a Dept to and wondered if he would like to come along to get a Drink or two with me at Flux?“, Shepard asked, looking at him with hopeful Eyes.  
„Hmm. I wonder who that Turian is? He'd be an Idiot if he'd decline the fearsome Commander Shepard.“, he teased then.  
The Human laughed at him, then told him to be in Flux at 1800 before he left him standing there.

Garrus was still feeling too cold on the Citadel, even if the Clubs Room was heated up by all the Bodys writhing against each other on he Dancefloor.  
He wondered if he would ever get rid of this constant Chill he felt since Noveria and it also dimmed his Mood by quite a bit, as his Companion noticed.  
„You alright, Garrus?“, Shepard asked and layed a Hand on his Shoulder.  
It felt much warmer than his own Hide, even through the Cloth of his Civis.  
The Man of course noticed that too. It had not been the first Time he was touched by him after all and Shepard had always been observant.  
Garrus, who had been watching the People inside the Club, looked at his Commander and felt himself slightly arching into that warm Hand on his Shoulder.  
„It's fine Shepard. I'm just not fully fit yet.“, he conceded, downing his Drink.  
It at least warmed his Insides for a bit.  
The Human sighed, not liking the Way he downplayed his Condition.  
They sat in Silence after that. Shepard starting to stroke along his Throat after a While, the Warmth of his Palm letting the Turian relax a bit and without noticing he started to purr.  
After another few Moments, the Hand left his Body and instead he was pulled from his Seat and out of the Club.  
He wondered where they were going but before he could ask, they entered one of the Wards many Hotels.  
„Shepard-“. He began to speak sounding insecure, as they stood in the Hotels Elevator, but was silenced by a Hand that layed itself on his Mouthplates.  
„It's alright Garrus. You'll be fine.“, he reassured him then pulled him along again when the Elevator opened.  
He was left standing in the Middle of a Suite, the Human doing something at a Terminal next to the Door they just entered through and he heard the Air Conditioner start to work a little hard.  
The Room was slowly getting warmer and then he felt Shepards Hand on his lower Back, pushing him in the Direction of another Door.  
The Suite they were in had something like a Living Room and through a open Gate they could look into the Bedroom and on the other Side through another open Gate a Dining Room.  
It was held in mostly dark colours. The Bedroom black and dark blue, the living room a little more light some creme colour and dark red and the dining room dark red with gold accents in it.  
It was a very weird Taste, if anybody would ask him but whatever.  
There were only two Doors, the first one to enter the Suite and the second one led to its Bathroom.  
His Commander pushed him into said Bathroom now and inside he started to fiddle around with another Terminal and the huge Bath started to fill up with Water, steam immediatly rising up.  
The Room was a light blue with some turqoise. The Bath was a deep Bloodblue so that the Water inside it looked like it was filled with Turian Blood.  
It was intriguing to say the least, also around it stood a few things that just showed exactly what kind of Hotel they were in.  
„Shepard-“, he began again, sounding even more insecure as before, but was again interrupted by Shepard.  
„I know what this looks like Garrus.  
I fucked up on Noveria. You're cold because of that, right?  
Chakwas said that could happen. I just-“  
A Sigh escaped the Humans Lips.  
„Let me help you. Nothing what happens here have to mean anything.  
Damn if you don't want anything to happen than nothing will happen.  
All I offer is a Place for you to relax and warm up.  
If you don't want that you are free to leave.“  
There was Regret in the Humans Eyes, like he was beating himself up for what happened on Noveria and now for dragging him here.  
For a few Moments the running Water was the only Noise in the Room, the Turian and Human silently staring at each other, until the taller one looked down with a guttural Sigh of Defeat.  
„I can't possibly say 'No' to that Shepard.“, Garrus said, his Hands starting to open the Clasps of his Clothes.  
He saw the Relief wash through Shepard and the Tension leaving him.  
This Man had really felt bad about what had happened, even though he hadn't blamed him a Second for it.  
„Am I going to be the only one in the Water or will you join me?“, he asked when he was nearly fully undressed, the Human rooted to the Ground a few Steps away from him.  
„Uh no. I-I was going to join.“, he stuttered, getting a little red in the Face, then started to rid himself of his own Clothes.  
He couldn't stop the rumbling Groan that escaped him as he slowly slid into the Water that was just perfectly hot.  
Yes, this definitely was a good Idea.

The hot Water already helped him a lot to rid himself of that constant Chill and the Tension that came with it.  
„This is just good.“, he rumbled and stretched out as he turned around to rest his Chin on his Arms on the Edge of the Bath.  
He heard the Human chuckle next to him, then heard the Lid of a little Tube opening and closing again, then felt a Pair of callused Hands on the Plates of his Back, his Cowl and groaned in Pleasure as the Man started to knead out the Knots on his Back.  
„Shepard you don't have to - uuuhnf thats just....- you dont have to do that.“, he said, but didn't sound very convincing with the near Moans he couldn't supress.  
„You know you can call me Leon, when we are both naked.“, the Man said teasingly, the Smile evident in his Voice.  
„And no I don't have to do that, but I want to.“  
He positioned himself better above the Turian who just rumbled his Consent and closed his Eyes to better enjoy the Attention.  
After a While, he looked up at the Human and turned around again, to face him.  
He looked at the other Male, his Mandibles spread wide in a relaxed Smile and offered him his Throat in a Show of Submission.  
If he wanted to, he could take him up on that Offer, he wouldn't be upset if he declined.  
It was just like Shepard had said before, anything that happened here did not have to mean something if they didn't want it too.  
He figured it would be a Shame to let this Opportunity slide without taking it.  
As Shepard, or rather Leon, slid closer to him and gently bit into his offered Throat, he knew, the other one agreed.  
„Let's take this to Bed.“, the Man said, he rumbled agreeably and both got out of the Water and dried off hurriedly.  
They did not care for their Clothes and hurriedly walked through the Suite towards the Bed.  
Garrus was the first to reach the Turian styled Bed, but before he could even think about climbing onto it, he was shoved into it roughly, the Human right behind him, taking a Seat right on his Thighs, his Hands running over them and up towards his Hips.  
He leaned on his Forearms and looked over his Shoulder at the Man, a constand Rumble going through his Chest that turned into a Moan when wo Hands found his Waist and squeezed and kneaded it deliciously.  
There wasn't anything that he could do from this Position, but he felt like that was exactly what Leon wanted and he was happy to give up this particular Control to him.  
He relaxed into the Sheets below him and closed his Eyes in Bliss as the Human kept on with his Ministrations to his Waist.  
„Spirits... you haven't ahh been lying when you said you've hnn been with Turians before.“, he said between Gasps.  
He felt Leon move above him, heard the Bedside Table opening and closing then a few Things fell next to him on the Mattress, he looked up curiously and saw a Bottle of dual chirality Lube and a Vibrator next to it.  
It was on the smaller Side, not enough to do much for either of them, he thought.  
He looked over his Shoulder to Shepard again with a raised Browridge, but the Man just grinned devilishly at him and stood up to turn him on his Back.  
His Plates were already spread wide and his own lubrication was oozing out of him, but his Length had not descended yet.  
Leon moaned at the Sight and licked his Lips in Anticipation.  
„You know“, he started to speak, grabbing the Vibrator and the Lube.  
He spread the Lube over the Vibrator and used his Hand to make sure it was everywhere on it.  
„There are some Turians“ Then he touched Garrus' Seam, wiggling his Finger over the exposed sensitive blue Flesh, making him throw his Head back with a loud Moan.  
„Who can't get enough“ The Finger slid into his Sheath as deep as it could go and now the Turian caught on to what the Human had planned.  
Spirits this could only get good from here on out.  
The Finger inside his Sheath was pressing against the Walls of his Sheath, wringing another Moan out of him.  
Soon another Finger joined the first, his Hands fisting into the Sheets at the intense Feeling.  
„Of getting their Sheath fucked.“, the Human concluded, taking out his Fingers again and carefully pushing the Vibrator into it.  
His Cock slid out of his Sheath as it entered him, another Moan escaped him.  
„Leon.“, he gasped. He pulled the Human closer with his Legs, felt his Erection on the Inside of his left Thigh. It twitched every Time he squirmed or his Breath hitched.  
„Leon.“, another Gasp, the Vibrator moving out of him again just to back in all the Way, much harder and faster this Time.  
„Yes, Garrus?“, the Human said with a self satisfied Grin on his Face, moving the Toy in and out of his Sheath.  
He turned on the Vibration just as he was about to speak again, effectivley shutting him up.  
The Toy was pressed all along his Cock either in or outside of his Sheath and it felt amazing, but he wanted more.  
He wanted to give back not just receive, did not want this to be one sided.  
„Want your nnnghh Cock.“, he gasped out as he finally found his Voice again.  
„You sure you're ready for it yet?“, Leon teased, amping the Vibrations up again and pushing the Toy in deep enough to hit his most sensitive Spots.  
His whole Body tensed and jerked as he came with a loud suprised Moan.  
Shepard kept the Toy deep inside him, let him ride out his Orgasm on the Vibrations and removed the Toy when he came back down.  
„I think you're ready now.“, he heard the Human say and then felt the hard and hot Head of his Cock press against his Sheath just below his own still pulsing Length.  
They both threw their Heads back as Leon entered Garrus' Sheath.  
The Turian already feeling the Heat inside his Core growing again, even though he'd barely come down from his last Orgasm.  
„Spirits.“, he moaned, still fisting the Sheets between his Talons, as he looked up to the Human who had yet to move.  
Leons Cock was quite a bit bigger than the Toy they had used before, but his Orgasm had left him relaxed and loose enough for him to enter easily.  
Still the Human shuddered above him, Eyes closed in Concentration and took in a few deep Breaths.  
He chuckled as he saw this, seemingly not the only one about to come right then.  
„Having Trouble Leon?“, he asked breathless but teasingly.  
„Hnnhn. Your tighter than I thought. Must be this incredibly huge Dick of yours, using up so much Space.“, he shot back, took another deep Breath than started to move slowly.  
Spirits it felt good.  
Garrus moaned shamelessly as he took hold of his own until then neglected Cock to stroke it according to Shepards Thrusts.  
He felt how Shepards Length hit all the sensitive Spots inside him as he thrust in, he felt the Relief his Sheath fired off as he thrust out.  
Leons Hand removed his Hand from his Cock and replaced it, squeezing hard, making him come again right away.  
The Humans Breath was ragged now, his Thrusts erratic and as deep as he possibly could go, he was chasing his own Release now as his Insides squeezed around his Length.  
Garrus watched him, as he buried himself deep one last Time, they both moaned as Leon shot his Load deep inside his Sheath, pushing him off the Edge again for the third Time.  
It took him a While to come back to himself and when he did, he felt a warm, damp Towel clean his lower Body, he was too lazy though to open his Eyes.  
He let out a content Purr, finally feeling warm again after Days of constant Chill.  
A chuckle made him open his Eyes then and he saw Shepard watching him.  
„It was good I presume?“, he asked, sounding smug.  
He only rumbled an affirmative, closing his Eyes again, too tired to shoot back a proper Reply.  
Another Chuckle above him, but this Time he kept his Eyes closed and curled into the warm Blanket, that magically spread itself over his Body, with a happy Purr.  
Sleep came easy this Time.


End file.
